Jim --
You can do it either way. To bring the backer over the flange, it's necessary to shim the studs so that the backer doesn't bend out over the flange. You can stop the backer about 1/4" above the flange, letting the vapor barrier behind the backer come out over the flange. As long as the tiles are around 4" or more you'll have no problem letting the tile overhang the backerboard. You can fill between the tile and the flange with thinset. Leave a 1/8" gap between the tile and the horizontal surface of the tub, and fill that gap with caulk instead of grout.
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jeff
Go Rutgers!
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