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Old 02-07-2018, 08:48 PM   #1
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: sunnyvale, ca
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nasty situation

I have friend, his dad has bad dementia - doesn't know about world, mom has some healthy issues, mentally is ok, but doesn't realize how bad the situation is, resp. doesn't want to admit they are going downhill. Dad is rapidly getting worse. They need to move to caring house, she doesn't want to. My friend is paying $600/day for 24h in home care. He is not rich, he will running out of all his savings next month.
Parents are sitting on house worth $1M - 2M, there's some debt on it, my friend doesn't know how much.
Is there anything he can do, force them...?
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Old 02-07-2018, 10:24 PM   #2
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He can have his father declared incapable of handling his affairs. Easier said than done, esp if mom protests. Take over the banking to make sure the house doesn't go into foreclosure. With that much money they can borrow against the house for their final months. Perhaps a lump some reverse mortgage. Be prepared to lose the house unless he can find someone to fund the medical care for an interest in the property.

Expect to spend $100k per week for ICU, 30k a month for in home care.

These situations never go well. He has my sympathies. BTDT.

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Old 02-08-2018, 02:03 PM   #3
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I would suggest he get a good family attorney and start proceedings right away. If necessary, he can declare that he's unable to pay for the home health care anymore, and that they won't pay for it, if that's the case.

If he has brothers or sisters, or maybe siblings of the parents, he should get them involved so it doesn't appear that he's simply trying to get their money.

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