Four religious truths

[LadyGodiva]

Got this in my email this morning and wanted to bring you guys a little chuckle for the day.


During these troubling times, people of all faiths should remember these four religious truths:




1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's chosen people.

2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.

3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian world.

4. Baptists do not recognize each other at Hooters :lol1:

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[tilerite]

:lol1: :lol1: :lol1: :lol1: :lol1: :lol1: :lol1:

[flatfloor]

What's a Hooters? :twitch:

[Scooter]

A place where owls are kept, usually a zoo.

[flatfloor]

Oh OK, thanks. :nod: makes sense

[kate42]

http://www.millan.net/minimations/smileys/cloversmileyc.gif (http://www.millan.net)

A place where owls are kept, usually a zoo.

Hmmm. I thought that was in the mountains of New Mexico.

[MudMaker]

Yes... Those are the Grand Hooters :)

[opiethetileman]

i want to see some hooters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that kind that ya have to throw over your back cause they hit the ground

[Dave Taylor]

that makes five religious truths........
Baptists don't recognize one another in the liquor store neither. :cool:

[ckl111]

If girls with big boobs work at Hooters where do girls with one leg work???


IHOP

[kate42]

Colin

:shake:

[RedRockTile]

I thought the Grand Hooters, ah, er, Tetons are in Wyoming? :uhh:

[LadyGodiva]

Baptism of a drunk

A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river.

He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps into the preacher.

The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, and asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"

The drunk answers, " Yes, I am."

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother have you found Jesus?"

The drunk says, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again, for a little longer this time.

He again pulls the drunk out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"

The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus."

By this time the preacher is at his wits' end and dunks the drunk in the water again-but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms and legs he pulls him up.

The preacher again asks the drunk, "For the love of God, have you found Jesus?"

The drunk wipes his eyes, catches his breath and says to the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"





:lol1: :lol1: :lol1:

[flatfloor]

With that the preacher pushed the drunk under for the fifth time, held him under for 2 minutes, brought up the sputtering drunk and yelled...."Now have you found Jesus?"

The drunk sobbed yes...yes and the preacher promptly pushed him under again telling him he was lucky to die so soon after being born again. :)

[kate42]

he was lucky to die so soon after being born again.


And what number truth is this???? :scratch:

[flatfloor]

Chapter 22 Verse 21 Flatfloor's Book of Religious Things to Base a New Religion on. :rolleyes: