Christmas Choir

[Bud Cline]

IN THE SPIRIT OF THE SEASON at hand...
I think we should organize a CHRISTMAS CHOIR here at JBS.:rudolph:

What do you think?:tree:

We already have the harmony, the voices, the talent, all we need to do is select our music and set aside some of our free time for a little practice.:yipee:

So speak up folks............:D

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[Cami A]

I was in the junior high choir. It was suggested that my future wasn't in music, and I should either mouth the words or switch my elective to journalism. :D:D:D


This must be my second shot at fame! For our first selection, I'd like to suggest the following song- it made me think of Bud and Sonnie...

:tree: :tree: :tree:

Chipmunks roasting on an open fire
Hot sauce dripping from their toes.
Yuletide squirrels fresh-filleted by the choir
They poked hot skewers through their nose.

Everybody knows
Some pepper and a garlic clove
Help to make them seasoned right.
Tiny rats with a crisp golden coat
Will really hit the spot tonight.

And now when Santa sees his tray
There'll be some homemade chipmunk jerky for his sleigh
And every hungry child is gonna spy
To see if chipmunks really sing when they fry.

And so I'm brushing on some honey glaze
To keep them crisp and juicy too.
Let's hope they get served
Many times, many ways;
Tasty chipmunks, good food.

And so I'm offering some recipes
From chipmunk pie to chipmunk stew.
I'm not really sad
That it ended this way.
Furry chipmunks, screw you.

:santa: :santa: :santa:

[Bud Cline]

ROFLMGDAO:rofl:



See there is hope. I knew Cami would be the first with a worthwhile contribution. I think we may already have our opening song.:yeah:

[cx]

Goodest Christmas song I ever see! :D:D:D

I give it three Bah, Humbugs. :p

[flatfloor]

Cami, do you do know that most serial killers tortured small animals in their childhood? They are usually white middle class males in their early thities. I believe you fit 4 of 5 points in the profile.:D

[Cami A]

Ya can't prove a thing, Jim...;)

I can't find the writer of that charming verse to give credit where credit is due- I heard it on one of the morning shows. Don't want Jim thinkin' I've only been pretending to be female to avoid suspicion...:rolleyes:

:santa: :tree: :santa:

[John Bridge]

Oh, man. THIS will affect our ratings for sure. And just when I figured we were on the way up. ;)

[Sonnie Layne]

the spirit's all right
but no rodent should celebrate be,
though my thought
nor member of my brain
be spent with lack of wont
for lack of celebrant's pee.

I.E.

Inna godda davidda baby....


Forgive me, I'm outa work and the luxury of free actions in the be... kitchen has gotten to me.

If I keep my head about m'self
I'll find my eyes upon the shelf
where surely I'll be most like to find
the thinkings of those most like my kind.

[John Bridge]

I think there may be hope for me. Sonnie's stuff is starting to make a lot of sense. :)

[Cami A]

Maybe we need a JB "Twelve Days of Christmas"...

On the first day of Christmas....
A parrot on a banjo?

[davem]

Two orange buckets

[Cami A]

Three Felker Saws

[flatfloor]

Four decorators dancing.

http://www.sandwich.k12.ma.us/webquest/fairietale/dancingfairies.jpg

[MikeC]

Five Brass towel rings.

[John Bridge]

Six sheep a . . . naw, I won't go there. :D

[Cami A]

Too late... :D:D:D

Where's Bud? Late for choir practice?

[flatfloor]

Teaching 6 sheep to go a-leaping.:sheep:

[Sonnie Layne]

seven baked hens....

[cx]

Hell, I don't know the words to the real one. :(

But we gotta git some Wapiti in there, too. :)

[Bud Cline]

Eight owls a sizzlin'...

[flatfloor]

I looked for the right words , nothing but parodies. Cami will find 'em.

Nine Elk a-ruttin'.:rudolph:

[MikeC]

1 Partridge in a pear tree
2 Turtle Doves
3 French Hens
4 Calling Birds
5 Golden Rings
6 Geese A-laying
7 Swans A-swimming
8 Maids A-milking
9 Ladies Dancing
10 Lords A-leaping
11 Pipers Piping
12 Drummers Drumming

[Cami A]

Ten tilers tiling...

:tree: :tree: :tree:

[Bud Cline]

....eleven weirdos typing....

[John Bridge]

Thanks, Mike. Now what's your contribution? :shades:

[MikeC]

John, you musta skim-coated right over it :) It's back on the 1st page of this thread.

Ratcheer http://johnbridge.com/vbulletin/showthread.php?threadid=4448&perpage=15&pagenumber=1

[Hobbit]

Twelve HD experts



:)

[John Bridge]

Ah yes, Mike, I did skim coat it a bit. ;)

[Cami A]

So glad that's all straightened out....

The Twelve Days of John Bridge

Twelve HD experts
Eleven weirdos typing
Ten tilers tiling
Nine Elk a-rutting
Eight owls a-sizzling
Seven baked hens
Six sheep a-leaping
Five brass towel rings
Four decorators decorating
Three Felker Saws
Two orange buckets
And a parrot on a banjo.....

:santa: :santa: :santa:

[cx]

Hehehe, I like them owls a-sizzlin'. :D

[John Bridge]

Far as I'm concerned it's better than the original. :p

[Bud Cline]

OK....now we're cookin'. Where'sSonnie by the way?

We are going to need some additional material though and time is getting short.

How about???? Grandma got run over by a John Deere? That's a local favorite but what's the words?

[MikeC]

Grandma got ran over by a John Deere
Walking down our driveway Christmas eve
Grandpa thought he knew what he was doing
but, Grandma picked a real bad time to leave.

We all tried to warn her, but the tractor was so loud
We got up to try and catch her
Ah, but much too late, she'd done been plowed.

Chorus

I've got to hand it to my Grandpa,
never once did he lament.
He just went and got a lawyer,
and a seven million dollar settlement.

Chorus

etc etc etc...
=============================================

Here's another for all of you Texans.

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
Twelve yellow roses
eleven blueblonnets
ten gallon hats
nine cowboy boots
eight enchiladas
seven jalapenos
six armadillos
five chili beans
four oil wells
three pickup trucks
two tumbleweeds
and a possum in an oak tree

[Cami A]

I guess we are running out of time to put together the song list... :eek:

Vinnie sent me this one, and asked me to remind those that haven't posted a pic that there's no excuse with the new software. :santa:

'Twas the night before Christmas,
Da whole house was mellow,
Not a creature was stirrin',
I had a gun unda my pillow.

When up on da roof'
I heard somethin' pound,
I sprung to da window,
To scream, "YO! Keep it down!"

When what to my
Wanderin' eyes should appear,
But dat hairy elf Vinny,
And eight friggin' reindeer.

Wit' a bad hackin' cough,
And da stencha burped beer,
I knew in a moment
Yo, da Kringle wuz here!

Wit' a slap to dere snouts,
And a yank on dere manes,
He cursed and he shouted,
And he called dem by name.

"Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
Yo Sally, Yo Vito,
Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,
Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!"

As I drew out my gun
And hid by da bed,
Down came his boot
On da top a my head.

His eyes were all bloodshot,
His b.o. wuz scary,
His breath wuz like sewage,
He had a mole dat wuz hairy.

He spit in my eye,
And he twisted my head,
He soon let me know
I should consider myself dead.

Den pointin' a fat finga
Right unda my nose,
He let out some gas,
And up da chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh,
... screaming,
And away dey all flew,
Before he troo dem a beatin'.

But I heard him exclaim,
Or better yet grump,
"Merry Christmas to all, and
Bite me, ya chump!"

Anybody know if Vinnie's coming to the year-end bash? :tree:

[flatfloor]

Yes, well..er...um he sorta thinks he'll be there. Seems he and his girlfriend, Strumpet, ran into the cast of the Sopranos, literally, he and Strumpet hit their Limo broadside and Vinny told them they were a bunch of phonies not too bad in and of itself but then the cops showed up. Vinny has no license, insurance, stolen plates, stolen car etc. Strumpet hit a cop with her purse at which point a gun flew out of it.

Bruce Cutler is trying to arrange bail.:shake:

[bbcamp]

The Stankhammer boys may be able to help. Seems they've some experience with the legal system! :D

[John Bridge]

Ah yes, the spirit of Christmas. :)

[Bud Cline]

Sounds to me more like the Christmas of spirits.:yummy: