Cleaning the cat

[Mike2]

1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.

4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash and rinse".

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.

9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.


Sincerely, :lol1:


The Dog

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[Davestone]

:clap2:
As the owner of a house with pet cats,dogs, and rats,you have no idea the ramifications of this.

[jdm]

I wasn't aware that toilets had two lids. I've always thought that the lower one with the hole in it was a seat.

But maybe from the perspective of the dog ....

[Splinter]

Would you even consider doing that to this sweet face?


say hi to Penelope...

[Hamilton]

Maybe.... depends on the cat. :devil: We've had alot of cats and they are
all different. Ive got one in mind that deserved this cleaning method :yeah:

[John Bridge]

Well, I've known for quite some time that Mike is an animal hater. Sorry, Mike, just have to let the cat out of the bag. :)

He has a long track record of tormenting various types of animals including fish (salmon), varmints, coons, possums, you name it. He's a mean man.

:D

[Mike2]

Hey...this whole thing was the dog's idear, not mine!! :tongue:
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Gotta luv them dogs, eh? :tup2:

[JTG]

Reminds me of the story the Armstrong rep told of the guy who picked up the family cat as it started to walk across the VCT adhesive he was spreading on the floor. Picks the cat up by the back of the neck and stands up to take it out of the room and the cat starts on his arm with its back legs and he drops it. Yep, right into the bucked to glue.
He picks it up again and hands it to the helper and says "Get outside quick and take the hose to this cat and clean it up". Out the door goes the helper and cat and the shrieks of the cat and screams of the helper to on for awhile until the helper, arms bleading says thats it not more.
end of story they have to send the cat into the groomer to get shaved.
:yeah:
JTG

[Mike2]

Ah...and now we all know better. Don't shave that cat! Give it a swirly!

:D

Oh, and by the way, out West here where we have a large Scandinavian population, our toilets come with two lids. Us Norwegians use the lower one. Them Swedes use the top one. :tongue:

[Scooter]

God bless Maynard, the ferel cat we put down last week, but I do need to tell a story about him.

We were doing a remodel on a home and had to run some romex in the attic along the rafter in an area about 2 feet wide and 3 feet high, with no decking. Just naked floor joists. It was impossible and I went home scratching my head what to do. All my electrical tools would not cover this 30 foot chase without snagging.

So I'm sitting with my wife pounding down a few beers, and she suggests that we use our cat. Her idea is to tie a string to his neck, put him in the electrical chase, and have a helper turn on a can opener (ala Pavov) to make him think its dinner time. He runs down the chase, we use the pull string to thread the romex, and its done.

It was such a ridiculous idea that it had to work, and work it did.

[dgunnels]

The Dude abides still.

[tilesnake]

I'm gonna catch hell from animal lovers but here we go...after a night of boozing I thought it would be funny to throw the cat in the hot tub so
that's exactly what I did! My neice didn't think it was so funny and I had
bruises on my right shoulder the next morning......

Tilesnake.

[Dave Taylor]

Farmer fellow I worked with from Iowa tells the story bout when he and his bro were much younger they set the family cat's tail on file using some kinda' liquid available on most farms. The poor thing escaped em' and (with tail a-blazin') ran under the milk barn.... which proceeded to burn to the ground.

Cat got away OK but without no tail. My acquaintance and his bro would see it a-sittin' in the field lookin' at em'.... but they could never git' near it again.
Hah; there is justice in the animal kingdom.